I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
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