Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
