Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize