marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize