i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
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Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
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I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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