I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
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Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
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Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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