i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
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