Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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