New invention idea: vibrating tampons
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
