And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
