Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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