nut hugger
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
