I hope mine doesn't look like that
im six kinds of drunk right now
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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