So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
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