Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Drake has all the answers
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize