Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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