We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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