just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
