Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
