We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Randomize
