i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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