After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
