Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize