i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
