we're blogging at a bar
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
love makes seman taste better
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
Randomize
