it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Houston, we have a blender
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Randomize