How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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