hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i just found a plastic monkey in my sweatshirt pocket
Umm I had a plastic mermaid in my pants......
Really
You win
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
What a dumb baby whore.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
My ass is underappreciated
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Randomize
