But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
If I die, sorry about rent.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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