Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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