It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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