you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Randomize
