She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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