I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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