What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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