you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
