Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Do vagina's smell?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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