I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
