woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize