How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
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