Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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