Its about making memories worth repressing
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
