Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
