Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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