What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
