She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
