I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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