Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Green mimosas i think yes
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
