sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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