I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
25 Men Confess The Moment They Knew They Wanted To Marry Their Wife
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
You Wouldn’t Guess That These 25 Celebrities Are Complete A**holes
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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