Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(310): View more from California

This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

we were pretty classy up until the second keg

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(217): View more from Illinois

i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick

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(435): View more from Utah

it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(248): View more from Michigan

You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...

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(440): View more from Ohio

well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.

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(503): View more from Oregon

If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family

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(714): View more from California

HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again

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(607): View more from New York

It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.

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