Texts From Last Night

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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.

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  (709): She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it. http://tfl.nu/7xo2
  Replies (26) Good night (680) Bad night (4462)
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me

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  (312): I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me http://tfl.nu/3z7z
  Replies (11) Good night (4585) Bad night (1356)
• Favorite

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house

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  (218): Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house http://tfl.nu/lsbu
  Replies (17) Good night (4998) Bad night (920)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.

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  (760): she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door. http://tfl.nu/tltu
  Replies (24) Good night (1894) Bad night (4233)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young

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  (815): its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young http://tfl.nu/hsw4
  Replies (7) Good night (2516) Bad night (939)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  Are my feet made of real feet?

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  (740): Are my feet made of real feet? http://tfl.nu/dext
  Replies (17) Good night (5921) Bad night (1170)
• Favorite

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.

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  (709): Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you. http://tfl.nu/s4f8
  Replies (13) Good night (1467) Bad night (3724)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.

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  (703): I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face. http://tfl.nu/cgkz
  Replies (16) Good night (770) Bad night (2889)
• Favorite

  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.

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  (780): Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex. http://tfl.nu/0kw1
  Replies (7) Good night (1070) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.

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  (813): That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice. http://tfl.nu/27fq
  Replies (6) Good night (416) Bad night (711)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman

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  (716): She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman http://tfl.nu/qx5u
  Replies (5) Good night (960) Bad night (288)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.

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  (314): I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that. http://tfl.nu/pv07
  Replies (1) Good night (422) Bad night (542)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.

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  (815): So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit. (815): Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message. http://tfl.nu/tst8
  Replies (0) Good night (728) Bad night (348)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.

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  (307): Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen. http://tfl.nu/bs4y
  Replies (0) Good night (693) Bad night (207)
• Favorite

  (949): View more from California

  I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley

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  (949): I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley http://tfl.nu/8av2
  Replies (0) Good night (169) Bad night (55)

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