She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Randomize